Resolutions 2009- Status Update ;)

For post 999, I wanted to do a check in with my resolutions last year (posted the link so you know I'm not fibbing..haha)... Sooo.. Here they are! Updates are in bold!

1. Development. I'm happy in my job and have some time under my belt now. I dont need to PLAN everything, but I want to take steps toward where I may be going... investigate other positions within my company, talk to mgmnt, figure out what I need to do in order to get there if I want. I want explore other opportunities to grow professionally..

Update: Well, I participated in a leadership exploration group which I was nominated for through my management. :) I was also voted to be and served as the loaned executive for our company through the United W*y Campaign this year! And...as some of you read recently, I got a leetle promotion! So, I'd consider this one met for now! This is an ongoing process...development that is... and I'm glad I feel like I made some great steps this year. :)

2. Get fit. I was SO good at this last year. And with a trip to Vegas and high school reunion approaching, there's no time like the present to get back in it. I've been checking out a new gym b/c they have better trainers and a pool. I think a pool would be good for my back...and I used to swim...so why not, right?! We'll see...

Update: *sigh* Do we really need to talk about this one? haha... I got in decent shape for my vacay with Eric, but lately have not been so impressed with my efforts..or lack thereof. *le sigh* This will prolly make the list again this year..

3. Volunteer. This was one of my "mini" goals for last year...but this year, I want to up it. There's some part of my life that just doesnt feel as fulfilled...and it's this part. You're never too busy to give back, so I will find the right philanthropy and will help out! And you can come too!!

Update: Happy to report serving as a loaned exec for the United W*y this year for three months full time definitely broadened my volunteer horizons and I'm very pleased with that! You've all read about that journey, so I won't go on and on, but I will say I already signed up for the "community investments" piece of the UW campaign for 2010! It's basically the allocation committee for where funds like I helped raise this year will actually go.

4. I plan to continue with the financially responsible thing and build from it...

Update: A perpetual work in progress. haha.. I'm responsible and all, but financially planning is never really done, is it? *le sigh*

5. GET.A.NEW.CAR. Sheez!

Update: I GOT A NEW CAR in February of 2009! I now have a Ford Edge with all the stuff I wanted...including my fav, heated seats. *happy sigh* And I still love her today! She hasn't had any problems and got a great report at her check up a couple weeks ago! (She kinda need a bath and a good vacuuming right now, but we won't go there).

6. Continue to travel, etc, when I have the chance. Life is about planning, saving, etc...but if there's one thing I learned while I was working every break, every summer, every Friday afternoon at the firm...Life's about memories and family and friends and experiences more than its about billing hours, saving a few hundred extra dollars, etc... You wont always have the chance to take "that weekend trip" etc...

Update: I love this one. I try to keep it on the list every year! This year, Eric and I were really fortunate with a combo of travel miles, traveling in low season, etc.. and were able to go to St. Lucia! Ahh, to go back there right now... Easily the best vacation I've ever taken and favorite place I've ever visited. :)

*****************************************************************************

Overall, I'm pretty pleased with how I did. 2009 was a pretty good year, peeps! So, I think I'll post my new resolutions tonight if possible along with some things I've learned in 2009. What about you? Do you do resolutions and check-in with them or am I the only lame one here..? :)

And in other fun news, I think I've found someone who said she'll help me with my bloggy design! I am so freaking excited you have no idea!!!

Hope you're having a fabulous Wednesday!! We got some more snow yesterday but nothing crazy thankfully!!!

What's everyone doing for NYE? I tried to make pin curls last night for my 1920s themed party we're attending and um.. let's just say I looked like Shirley Temple gone wrong when I woke up this morning. Whoa. Not gonna do that..haha...

Dashing Through the Snow....

...or mostly stuck in snow, but whatever. :)

Some Christmas-esque photos!

The "A" team from work...aka the lovely ladies that make the magic happen at our large meetings. This pic includes in random order: Public Affairs (me. duh), VP, HR, Event Planner, Assistants and Learning & Development. :) Holiday lunch=awesomesauce. :)

On Christmas Eve, the snow was starting to fall when I opted to load up the pup, presents, and my stuff and head to mom's around 3:30ish. I thought it would just be convenient to get there early and let Eric pick me up at mom's in order to head to his fam's Christmas Eve his aunt and uncle's casa in Owasso. Little did I know it would be the best move I ever made b/c with the snow that came in, I didn't make it back to my apt til Sunday! Whoaemgee!

Despite the crazysauce weather, I'm really glad we made it to his fam's Christmas Eve out in Owasso (for non Tulsans, Owasso is a new suburb of Tulsa...like 10 min by hwy outside of town). I had a really good time hanging with his fam, laughing, eating some yummy food and having that "big Christmas" feel that mom and I don't really get since there's just two of us. :) Everyone all gathered around the big tree and opened presents from each other and it was just really freaking cute. It was my first time out there with Eric b/c we hadn't really been serious a long time around Christmas last year. I just felt really included and it meant a lot..and I honestly had a lot of fun! *smiles* As we were eating, we saw some lightning (whoa) and heard thunder and we looked outside to admire how the annoying sleet had turned to fluffy, pretty snow...not really ever thinking about how cuhrazysauce it was getting outside. I mean..Tulsa rarely gets enough snow to really do anything, so yeah.

As we left around 8:30ish, I made Eric's brother take a photo of us on our awesome white Christmas Eve! Lookie how happy.. aww... And then we tried to leave. For like over an hour we tried to leave. Let's just say I'm really glad I got the yay-happy-snow photo above before we tried to drive anywhere.. haha..

We got stuck soooo badly. Eric and I were in one SUV and the rest of his fam was in another. All of us=stuck in the neighborhood. Eric, his bro, his dad, his uncle, his cousins, all had to push the suvs! We finally opted to just push them backwards back to his aunt and uncles house (seen below pulling into their drive) and evaluate from there...would be stay the night there? Would we try it again? We opted to give it another go and made it (note: "stabletrack" is not your friend on snow. It applies the brakes. Lesson learned: turn it off. haha). Along the highway drive home, it was like freaking Armageddon with cars abandoned in the middle.of.the.highway! It was berzerk! With Eric's mom driving Eric and me...and his dad in another car taking his grandparents home, we opted to head for his parents house. It's a straight shot down the highway (unlike my mom's which would have been quite out of the way). Thankfully, his dad was able to pick up a 4 wheel drive Avalanche (he's in the car business) and got me home on Christmas Eve around midnight to wake up Christmas morning at mom's... I think mom was totally cool with wherever I ended up staying, but I could tell she was concerned I wouldnt make it home for Christmas day with the weather, so I was really thankful Eric's dad was able to get me there. :)

Annnnnd Christmas morning, this is what we had! (Here's my mom's old beagle doggie, Beau) :)
Gracie looked like she was swimming in it! She HATED it at first but then would run face first into it and roll around like a crazy dog! haha! :) This is her darting for the door in full on dog panic b/c she had no idea what the snow was...
A drift up to my knees!
Self timer in the backyard.. attempt one... mom, me, and the dogs. I look like I'm squatting in the snow or something. Not okay.
Take two-the wind blew the branch the camera tripod was on, so a leetle crooked, but still cute :)
Mom and me in the den.. ho ho ho! (When you're snowed in with me, you end up with a photoshoot). This is a time where I was cool to not have 20 people in my house for Christmas b/c snowed in with mom, movies and wine is much more fun than a cramped house with lots and lots of peeps, I bet! :) (imagining some of my larger-familied-friends having a breakdown :/)
At Avatar with 3D glasses and a fur hood (no idea about the hood, but he looks kinda scary-eskimo).
I wanted a photo with the glasses, too. We can admit that's why this photo happened. Sunday night, Christmas with Eric at his place FINALLY! Had hot tea, watched a movie (500 Days of Summer) and opened gifts! :) Self timer...
Haute.
One of my fav things Eric got me..and a fav gift period-a blown up photo on canvas from our trip to St. Lucia!!! I heart this guy... :)

And a funny side note... In the photo, my sarong was bunchy around my booty so Eric photoshopped the sarong! LOL! I was like "You photoshopped my ass?! That's amazing!" haha! We laughed. Hard. Here's the actual photo (pre photoshopped) :)

I heart bows. And random, but you might have noticed the scarf in 3/4 of the photos. (Read: I looked back at the pics and thought "oops." haha) Yes, I really did wear it that much.. partly b/c I was FREEZING and had limited attire during the unanticipated blizzard of 09 and also partly b/c I.freaking.love.it. My coworker got it for me from Gap for Christmas!! It's plaid (awesome), warm (awesome), super long (awesome) and has fringe (AWESOME).

Despite being snowed in and jazz, it was a great Christmas!! Had a blast with mom and some (likely needed) bonding, saw some great movies, got to hang with Eric and his family as well as my friend, Lauren, and and got some great r&r. :) I really have a lot to be thankful for and feel very blessed. It sounds like most of you had great Christmases as well and I'm so glad to hear it! I hope everyone is gearing up for a fabulous 2010! I cannot BELIEVE it's the end of 09! Good gawd.

Oooooooh and today, I had a hair appt and darkened it a little! Ifreakingloveit! My stylist is awesome, but she knows me oh so well so when I say I wanna go brunette, she tilts her head like "really?" haha.. (I usually immediately want to go blonde again). But, we compromised today and added a different color brown..and more of it...than we usually do, so maybe add even more next time! Whatcha think?!

Sorry for the complete and utter randomness.... Hope you had a great Tuesday!

996!! Whoa.

996 is the number of posts I'm on! Oh.my.gawd. I yammer on a lot...and um.. this is proof.. haha.. You see, I started a blog after some of my college friends (Kat and Karl, Brooke and Paul, etc in my links) started theirs to stay in touch with each other. :) That was somewhere around 2005. I know bloggidies have become more and more prevalent since then and I've even changed mine (it used to be my full name but I didn't heart that, so closed the old one down and moved over here). :) Kelsey prompted me to pay attn to how long I've been doing this as today is her one year bloggidy bday! :) And when I looked, I thought "if I time this right, I could hit 1000 posts at NEW YEARS! Ohmygosh I have to try!" So, even though I was gonna skip blogging today, opted to go for the goal!!!

And a question for you! I think I want to pay someone to make my bloggidy pretty to celebrate my 1,000th post. Recommendations?!

Okay, now on to other things.. HOW WAS YOUR HOLIDAY?! :) It snowed here.. rephrase.. We had a blizzard on Christmas Eve. haha.. No really, we did. Next year, I might wish for just a "light dusting" instead of a full blown White Christmas b/c I just got home.. As in was just able to get out of my mom's neighborhood TODAY (Sunday!). Eric and I haven't even had our Xmas yet b/c we couldnt get outta our parents neighborhoods! hah! (It's funny today b/c I'm mobile. Wasn't super funny the other day.. Read: I was overdramatic).

But, it was certainly beautiful and kinda cool to say we had a white Christmas for the first time in years...even if it hindered mobility. I'm just glad I was able to get to my mom's house to spend time with her. :) And I was still able to go to Christmas Eve at Eric's fam's in Owasso which was super fun! Love his family! More to come on that with photos later. :) (along with the "we got severely stuck in the snow" story)

Christmas with mom was great! We would have loved to get outta the house, but forced bonding over Sex and the City and other dvds isn't so bad...and it definitely didn't hurt us any. :) Pics to follow :) (PS..I have an SUV..but it's not 4 wheel drive. Sooo that doesnt do much in this weather. Awesome. haha)

Yesterday, Lauren's dad came to get her for a movie.. and since I was a few blocks away, they let me tag along! YAY getting out of the house and spending time with friends!! Mom went to a movie with her friend, too... :) We saw.....

...and I liked it! It was very "real" if you will. It's not a fairy tale type story, but it's thought provoking and just plain good. Two thumbs up!

Then, last night, Eric's dad, Eric and his bro came to grab me (they had 4 wheel drive and were super sweet to come get me :) ) to see this...
...in 3D! I haven't seen a 3D movie in...well.. I can't even remember! It was really good! I like that kinda stuff..aliens..sci fi, etc...My wannabe lawyer friends read John Grisham. Even in law school, I preferred Dean Koontz. Comical. Anyway, I also dig James Cameron, so yeah. :) We did, however decide that it was kinda Fern Gully + Aliens + attempt at blue Native Americans. *shrugs* I NEVER get motion sickness but when they were flying around with the 3D stuff in full effect, I had to look down a couple times! I was like "Jackie, don't be that girl..don't get sick while at the alien movie with the boys" haha.. Two thumbs up on this one, too. :)

Okay, I need to unpack some stuff and then re-pack Eric's gifts and hopefully head over there for us to finally have our Christmas together! I hope you had a great holiday weekend and spent lotsa time with family and/or friends :) Much love from a snowy Tulsa!

Merry Christmas to All!

Hi peeps! Just a quick post wishing everyone a very Merry Christmas! :) I'm at work right now, but only b/c I'm not traveling (My mom and Eric's fam are all in Tulsa) and there are plenty of peeps traveling and/or with kiddos that need the day off today more than lil ol me! (Plus, why eat a day of vacay for no reason). That said, I think I'm headed home soon with laptop in tow. :)

Got everything wrapped last night! Here are some of em.. I had a coworker show me how to make holiday bows this year! (way too excited for my own good about this... I'll admit) :) Little Gracie kept walking over the wrapping paper and laying on it... haha... She was trying to help... (if your gift has puppy fur in it, sorry about that :/)
One of the reasons I'm heading home soon is b/c in just a couple hours, it's supposed to look like this outside!!!!
That's right! We're supposed to have a WHITE CHRISTMAS for the first time in like 8 years!! :) Kinda nervous about the sleet and 40mph winds/decreasing visability they're saying is coming with the snow... but really pumped about the fluffy white stuff!

Tonight, headed to Eric's fam's (weather permitting) then to my mom's where Gracie and I will stay the night and celebrate Christmas tomorrow! :)

Annnnnd some fun Christmas news: ERIC PASSED the first section of the CPA that he took in November! YAY! He found out yesterday!!!! Hooray! :)

Merriest of Christmases to you and Happy Holidays, everyone!! :)

Things that are awkward...

...when you're in the bathroom, run into someone, start talking to them and then they're still talking while you're done and ready to exit said bathroom. Do you stay? I mean...are they really done talking after that last comment? Or will you leave them talking to themselves feeling stupid?

Yeah, so just stand there awkwardly at the door acting like you're drying your hands..again..and again.. uttering a "yeah..." or open the door really loudly...yeah... awkward all the way around..

(and this is at work. b/c if this whole thing happens to you at home, I'm concerned for you and why you have stalls in your house)

Weekend Update and other Randomness!

Since I was a bad blogger, some of these pics are from last weekend... Annnnd here we go!

Gracie hates her Santa hat, but she's oh so adorable.. :)

Kristy and Josh's Christmas party last weekend! Marla and Beth pose with Griff in his holiday sweater... haha..
If we had a holiday card, I'd photoshop Gracie in to this photo and it'd be done. Just sayin. :)
Had a dirty santa exchange... a snuggie was one of the more popular gifts. Here Josh is saying "drink the kool aid..." *giggling*
And if the girls had a holiday card, this might just be the winner... :) Sara, me, Marla, Beth, Kristy and Oscar
Marls and I took the snuggle, added a scarf, and made it a dress. It'll be on project runway. You just wait. (When does that start again btw?)
Jackie=driving to lunch and accidentally got stuck in the traffic for the annual toy run. Buuut lookie how many motorcycles! Kinda cool! (All the way back beyond the horizon line)
Thursday night=one of my friends threw a holiday partay along with her guy friend. He has an amazing house and was a great host. This pic, however, is a little (a lot) creepy. Please look at him between Marla and me... haha...
I mentioned the wine cellar right? Yeah. Those are quite a few corks.. just sayin...
Which one shall we pick? haha..
In retrospect, it's kinda gross that we sat in the bed for this photo, but it is what it is.

Saturday afternoon, Sara and I took a flat doll around named Gracie and took photos with it. Apparently, it's tied to some story called "Flat Stanley" that her friend's niece is doing in 3rd grade. It's kinda a morbid story-something fell on some kid and made him flat so he could travel the world in an envelope.. Uh.. I think? haha.. Anyway, we took "flat Gracie" all over Tulsa and took photos with her in the cold while we laughed hysterically. :) The Mayo, Route 66, Cains Ballroom, Indian statue in Woodward, Golden Driller.. We called it "Gracie does Tulsa..." haha! Anyway, her next stop is Australia to Sara's aunt! Here's Sara at Cain's. :)

Sunday, the weather was GORGEOUS! So Gracie (as in my dog, not the flat doll we took around Tulsa) and I went to the pup park! Here's a classic example of her being an only child and being more engaged in sniffing than playing.. :)
But, she quickly took to playing...as long as I was close by :)
aww...muddy paws = indicative of a great time :)
Crowded dog park with the great (60 degree) weather!
I look like hell and had no makeup, but this pic is cute.. soo.. yeah.
How cute is my baby dawg? :)

Ah, what a great weekend! Friday had sushi with Timberly and then Saturday, had sushi with Sara and Eric joined us after the TU basketball win! :) (Yes, that is a lot of sushi. I know this.) :) Then, great, fat kid breakfast at Blue Dome Diner this morning with Eric and then finished Christmas shopping! (yes, I braved the mall.. it was whoa.).

Just have to wrap everything and grab a hostess gift for Eric's aunt for a Christmas Eve shindig he invited me to. :) Definitely bringing vino, but if ya'll have any addl recs, I'll take em!

Hope ya'll had a GREAT weekend and are ready for Santa! :) Sending blog lovin from T town! Little Gracie dog says woof.

Side note: I've decided to blame everything that I'm mad at.. on Tiger Woods. Try it! It's fun and it'll make you laugh... In traffic? Annoyed? Say out loud "Ugh.. this is Tiger's fault." Immediate move improver. Just saying.. haha!

Friday Wrap Up

E! does the Friday wrap up on their Daily Ten show.. sooo.. I'm doing one. B/c I can and I'm unmotivated b/c it's Friday..

1. THANK YOU for all your sweet comments on my last post! You gals are seriously awesomesauce and I was dying to blog about all that business b/c this blog, your feedback, etc, have really come to be part of my therapy, my sounding board, etc. Thanks, friends. For reals. Some of my blogs are randomness, but when I have something I really need affirmation on, advice on, thoughts on, etc.. ya'll are there. And, I'd buy you all a beer (b/c a glass of wine could get expensive and I'm broke.. haha) for reading that whole rant. Whoa. I looked at it again and thought "oops." haha..

2. I think I need to spend more time at TJ Maxx. A girl at my meeting had the most ADORABLE black bag... that was Cole Haan..that she got at TJ MAXX?! What?! Someone may be stopping there on their way home today for a quick browse...ya know.. just in case.

3. Tiger Woods drama needs to stop b/c um... I had a dream last night that Eric cheated on me with a porn star and I found out by watching the news. What?! Yeah.. haha.. I woke up very angry.. *laughing* (side note: Sassy Cassie had the SAME thing happen and I didn't realize mine was Tiger's fault til I read her blogiddy.. haha)

4. Went to a holiday party last night with some girl friends and the host had.. a wine cellar.. a tanning room..and multiple waterfalls outside. Quite fun! And I kinda want a wine cellar. haha.. Pics to come! :) Which reminds me I never posted last weekend's photos. Getwiththeprogram, Jax! Sheeeesh!

5. Meetings this week=success. Jackie, however, is TIRED. I dont get um.. anywhere before 8:00 am and I had to be AT the hotel across the city at 6:45 every day. Sleepy=me.

6. Things to do this weekend: Christmas shop. Christmas wrap. Christmas shop. Sheesh. I should be done by now. *head hung in shame*

Hope you have a great weekend, peeps!! I look forward to blogging more since my time is freeing up a lot after this last meeting I had.. :)

"The Situation" (the post about why I've been stressing)

(Jersey Shore reference...haha).

I took tonight to catch up on some of ya'll's blogs. I'm not wireless in my meeting so lemme tell ya what torture it is to be able to READ your blogs on my phone but not be able to comment (why cant I comment via crackberry or palm?! Arg!!!) So, I've been a bloggy slacker. Plus, I think I've had a lot on my mind... And here's the post about why!

So, you know how I said I had something stressing me and I'd tell ya'll when I could.

Well I can!

In a nutshell, I was talking to another potential employer (PE if you will) and it was getting awfully close to getting offered the jobbie and it was stressing.me.out. Let me start at the beginning...(this is where it gets long. Sorry).

While working at the UW, someone at PE recommended I apply for X job. X job was open, seemed right up my alley, would likely have been a LOT more money, etc. And while I wasn't looking, it posed some interesting bonuses.

To move up in my company, I might have to move at some point... and well.. I'm in my later 20s now..and I am kinda not wanting to start all over. all alone. somewhere random (our offices are NOT in cool places for the most part.. haha).

So, this gig at PE is local. And did I mention it pays well?

So, I thought "I'll hear this thing out." Then, it got filled the day I turned in my resume! I thought "eh well..wasnt meant to be..." Until.....that person couldnt take it and they pulled me in again! So, I thought "Fate? Maybe?"

I had my phone interview and the job had gone from being X to ...well...something CLOSE to X, but some of the duties had shifted a little. I was like "okay, that could be cool..." They dug me. I opted to go in for a "chat" in person.

Lemme back up, I had to take said phone interview IN MY CAR parked by a dumpster b/c well.. I think taking calls like that at work would likely be frowned upon.. haha..

Okay, so I go in for this "chat" with HR and end up chatting it up with the VP who I'd be working directly with for about an hour. We reallllllly got along. Great person. The company is large and stable... Okay, but through this "chat" day, some red flags were sent up. The job, X, I'd applied for, was now not just "Xish" but had become more of Yish! I was like "What the heck?" There were still strong elements of what I'd originally applied for, but it was being blurred with quite a few "other duties as assigned." Lemme just say it like this.. We have a whole dept to do what I think they might want this one person to do. Still a cool gig-just not certain it was for me anymore...

Side note: That kinda happens in PR/Communications sometimes... People often don't fully grasp the work and think it's a catch all.

Okay, so.. I had some mixed feelings. After some SERIOUS lost sleep, feeling UBER shady at work, inability to focus, etc, I got a call for another chat..this time over lunch with the managers who I'd be working with.

Cool.

By the time said lunch rolled around, I'd somewhat decided I didn't want the gig anymore. BUT, I was REALLY second guessing myself. Was it b/c I didnt want to take a risk? Was it b/c I dont like change? Was it b/c I'm scared? Lots of people underestimate how much I internalize everything and how hard I can be on myself b/c I talk so much and am so outgoing. But, I'm a BA in Psych and have a law degree. This chick analyzes EVERYTHING oooookay? ha!

All in all, I realized I didn't want it b/c well...the job I originally was recommended for, I REALLY LIKED. But the thing it had merged into was likely not where I saw my career headed, I think.

So, I opted to hear them out at lunch anyway just in case... And mind you, I work in a jeans/casual office. I mean.. business casual is a norm, but when it's this cold, everyone is in jeans and sweaters. Okay, sooo wearing a suit would have looked weird... esp since I'd worn one the day I had the "chat" only a week prior. Soo yeah.. I changed into and OUT of my suit... in the car. Yes, I changed for lunch and then changed back again to go back to the office. Good Lord.

This was really started to royally stress me out! ha!

Gets better. I walked in to lunch...not really nervous b/c I'd decided "I'm gonna get ALL my questions answered and if that makes em hate me, it wasn't meant to be..." So, I'm feelin good.... I thought "I hope I dont run into anyone I know" b/c I was downtown at a popular eating place....

.....and cue two partners from my old firm walking in at the same time I did.

Are. you. serious?!

Anyway, so then I became uncomfy and may have terrified the hostess by asking if she'd seat us as far away from those peeps as possible (before the interviewers got there. Duh). She thought I was nuts, but she did it. :)

The lunch went well, but there was just a vibe.. something that I was just not keen on. I believe you have to go with your gut. And I wish I could write details, but you never know who is reading. They were VERY nice people, but some of the things they said led me to believe the position was just a bit well...vague.

I didnt like that.

And I decided it wasn't for me. I was oddly a lot more calm once I made that decision (that's a sign, right? haha), but it was tough.. b/c I knew the job would offer a lot more than I make plus some other bonus factors and might end up being really cool.*shrugs*...and well.. I'm single. I live in an apt. With my dog. With a lot of student loans.

And oh how I want a house. So badly. And I wonder where I'm headed with my company sometimes.

But, that doesn't mean this was the best fit. Ultimately, I'm one of those "trust your gut" people...

So, (this is getting long-sorry) I called my boss and talked to her a lot about stuff in general. I'd been up for a level promotion for a little bit and was concerned with the economy that it wasn't going through...which is kinda an interesting facet to this whole ordeal. I mean.. if you're going nowhere fast, it might be a good idea to re-evaluate...if not for this position, then maybe one later... To my surprise, my boss had GREAT news, peeps...

I GOT THE PROMOTION!

It's not huge or anything, but it will certainly help this student-loan-paying girl out and put me in a better place should I decide to apply for higher positions. :)

I definitely thought that was fate. :) I discussed this jobbie thing with my boss and she's so freaking cool. She totally got where I was coming from. Phew. I mean.. I wasn't saying I WANTED to leave...and I hadnt even been looking, but rather.. this whole thing had gotten me all in a tizzy thinking about everything, ya know....She's awesome. sauce. period. So from there...

I opted to wait to see if PE called me again... I mean.. if my (maybe overly candid) questions had offended them, I might not be getting a callback, so I just hung out.

And they called.

So, Monday, I officially told them I wasn't interested and washed my hands of it.

Until they called me.. again....and again....haha.. I talked to them and explained why I wasn't planning to leave with a heavy heart. I didn't want to look flaky or like I led them on, but I really DID like the original gig...just not what it had seemingly evolved into in many regards. After THREE chats, I still wasn't 100% sure what the overarching duties were for sure. That's a bad sign.

She said "We havent even made you an offer yet-we'd love to have you come in again one last time. You're our top candidate...just so you know." (flattered)I said "thank you, but that's not fair to other applicants when I've decided it's not the best move for me right now." (Not sure she loved that. *nervous*)

Lemme just say....this is why if I ever left my current company, I KNOW I'd have to be fairly confident about leaving: I've been in a bad fit before re a job. I hated my life. I hated every.single.day. When the alarm went off, I thought "ugh." I'd walk in the building with a sense of dread. I'd sometimes cry in the bathroom b/c I hated being in trouble there or having someone perpetually mad at me it seemed. I was a mediocre employee b/c I hated it. That's NOT fair to me when I KNOW I have talent and know I'm better than that.. and should be happy, too.

That, my friends, is why I don't practice law anymore.... I realize it was likely a bad fit for me at that ONE place, but I just opted to give another career path a try and I.love.it. I love my team.. I love my job! I work in public affairs and have handled everything from testifying in a senate hearing about a bill we support to strategic communication planning to earning a seat with the big dogs as they discuss things that will affect our entire business. I write speeches. I work with almost all the initiatives and plans and promotions. I love the people I work with including EVERYONE I encounter with the company...well..almost everyone. ;) haha! We goof off, we "get" each other, we stand up for each other. And I LOVE the VPs I work with, too... They challenge me and have my back. They trust me and the work I do. I get to travel. My management believes in development and are happy to support anything I feel would help broaden my horizons-my management is so supportive. I mean.. hello.. my boss has been going to bat for me for a promotion of sorts for likely MONTHS in this tough economy.

And just sitting at that table at lunch with those peeps, I realized "wow, I know my stuff. Like I REALLY know my stuff. And I LOVE it. And I'm good at it. And I'm passionate about it."

So you see why it would be hard to leave...even for more money. But in the end, I'm happy and blessed to be where I am. :) I'm not struggling by any means... The right next step opportunity-whether with my company or not-is out there..maybe not this year or next....but I'm happy...and that's something I won't easily risk.... :) And I KNOW I am on the right path for me...to leave and enter something that might take me down a rabbit hole that could negatively affect my long term resume isn't worth it. (if that job ended up becoming more "Y" than "X" as it seemed it might).

But, lemme tell ya.. despite all the "what am I doing?" stress, it was kinda cool to be wanted like that. I've NEVER had an employer be that interested in lil ol me! haha! And the company was okay-the peeps were nice-I just wasn't certain about THIS gig.

Well, now you know what my little brain was all worked up about. You guys are SO right about having difficulties blogging when something's on your mind that you can't talk about (I've read that one a few of yours). Anyway... I hope I made the right decision. I feel in my gut that I did. :)

Normal bloggage resuming tomorrow. :) XOXO!

Happy 101 award-Top 10 holiday things!

Jenny DB at So Say I gave me the Happy 101 award last week! Thank you so much, Jenny!! Go read about her adventures with her fabulous pup, Bondi and her fun friends! (She just posted some fun photos, too) :)

Rules:

* 10 things that make you happy

* 10 bloggers who brighten your day

Okay, soooo I opted to do 10 things that make me happy about the Christmas season! :)

1. I've never had a mantle... We didn't have a fireplace when I was little (I dont know how that's possible considering it seems all houses have them now. And of course mom's house has one now... sheesh.) and my apt has one, buuuut it has no mantle. *sigh* Oh how I want to have my own mantle to decorate and hang stockings from! Someday for sure. :) Anyway, they're my fav for holidays!

2. Lights! Lights! Lights! They just make everything all aglow and pretty and almost seem magical!

3. Cookies! I saw some poinsettia ones on the CBS early show and really want to try to make em... yum! (I've been on a baking/cooking kick lately. Maybe I'm just hungry.. I dunno.. haha)

4. I heart Santa cokes. I dunno why. I just like em.

5. Gift lists on my favorite blogs (thank you for some GREAT ideas!) I've seriously gotten some GREAT ideas from you guys-hostess gifts, friend gifts, stuff for my own wish list.. Thank you! I scour the blog world for these... :)

6. cider. cider. CIDER. (and cocoa)

7. SANTA!!!!! You can't help but smile when you see a jolly dude in a red suit. :)

8. The smells! I recently got a Tyler candle called "Cathedral." Get it. It's holidayriffic! Like Christmas trees and yumminess!

9. Holiday parties with friends and time with family! I had one of these this past weekend actually. I need to post pics, but I'm trying to knock out my remaining online shopping tonight and I'd already started this blog, so weekend stuff will have to wait. :)

10. Last but NOT least... New Years!!! I LOVE New Years Eve! I'm actually quite a freakshow about it. I make resolutions and evaluate how I did every year (prepare for that one b/c I kinda rocked it this year...er...I think). And there's just something refreshing about New Years Eve. It just makes me smile to celebrate with people I care about. I'm a cheeseball, but I.just.love.every.second. The countdown part makes me feel like a kid at Disneyland.. no idea. I'm weird. I know.

There's so much more... finding that perfect gift for someone, wrapping presents while playing holiday music, jamming to Christmas Carols in my car, midnight mass with my mom on xmas eve and watching the kiddos struggle to stay awake through it...ahh.. I could go on and on.. I'd like to say I wouldn't list the bitter cold that we've got going on right now. hah.. That is all.

And for the tagging part, I'm copping out again (I know I know) but seriously.. I know we're all cuhrazy busy.. But I would like you to do this if that counts for anything...and I'd love it if you'd stick to your top 10s of the holidays! That's so fun to read! If you did it, feel free to leave a comment that you did b/c I totally want to read!!! :)

I have a BIG meeting tomorrow morning early early.. like 7am. Whoa. Well, the meeting isn't that early, but I have to be there that early since I prep the speakers/presenters, etc. Annnnd our 8am speaker just got stuck somewhere sooo we had to fill the agenda with randomness. Niiiice... haha.. Could make for an interesting day tomorrow, peeps... haha...

Hope your week is off to a great start and you're getting closer to being ready for Santa!!